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Kissing frogs, living through it, and writing to tell about it.

Tuesday, December 27, 2011

The 12-Hour Date

The 12-hour date... this date wins the award for 'Longest Date Ever', and is runner-up for 'Worst Date Ever' (see my last post for that one!) This date also occurred in the summer of 2010- Samuel lived in NYC, and drove the four hours to meet me in Albany. We met at The Crossings, my favorite walking-trail park, at noon for an afternoon of Frisbee and getting to know each other. When I first saw Samuel, I thought, "very cute!" He was dressed very nicely in dark jeans and a nice shirt, clean cut... he was about my height, which was slightly disappointing, as I like guys to be at least a few inches taller than me, but for the most part, he was attractive and resembled his pics (we don't always get that, do we ladies?).
We made our way to the center of the park, where we threw a Frisbee around for half an hour. Then we started walking and talking. After a bit, Samuel wanted to have a seat on a bench, where we continued our conversation. Then he asked if I wanted to sit somewhere more private (granted, the bench was on the side of the path, and the park was pretty busy on such a beautiful day), and he wanted to sit behind a couple of trees that were off the path, which I thought was a bit strange, but I was willing to give him the benefit of the doubt. Almost immediately after sitting down, he started being a little too "touchy-feely" for my comfort. Clearly, this guy had no problem expressing himself sexually. However, this was the first time meeting in person, and I was NOT comfortable with him wanting to put his hands all over me. This is the place where I should have politely put an end to the date, and wished him well. However, I seem to have the gene that causes me to allow things to drag on much longer than they should, and this date was no exception.
After he got the message (or so I thought) that I was not sleeping with him (much less, behind a few trees in a public park!) on this date, we went to a local restaurant for lunch. Then he wanted to see a movie. Then he wanted to get ice cream. Then he wanted to go back to the park. Then he wanted to get dinner. Then he wanted to go back to the park. The whole time Samuel kept trying to "get a feel" (pun intended) of where my physical boundaries lay, and how far I would allow him to go physically. A few times I mentioned that it was getting late, but he didn't seem to get the hint that it was time to go.
At one point (and the part that will always make this date memorable), I was showing Samuel pictures on my camera, including one of me with my best friend. Samuel asked me who the other girl in the picture was, and I told him she was my best friend. A couple of minutes later, he told me, "Next time [we meet], you and your best friend should come down to the city".... Um, why would my best friend come on a date, unless you wanted to get to know her instead? So I let Samuel know that if he was interested in my friend, he should just ask her out himself if he's interested in her (not that she would go for a classless ass like him, or for a guy that went out with her best friend, but he can certainly try!), and his response? "How would I go about doing that?" I told him she was also online, and he could message her. He replied, "Is that okay with you? But, wouldn't that hurt my chances with you?" I'm not sure if he registered the shocked and dismayed look on my face, but before I could respond, he said, "No, never mind, I'll just stick with you." Wow, dude, what a way to make a girl feel good about herself! I'm always honored to be told a guy is settling in order to be with me!
Finally, around midnight, Samuel told me he was too tired to make the 4-hour drive back to the city. I was not about to invite him home with me, so I told him to drive safely, and have a good night. He then decided he was going to get a hotel room, and wanted me to come stay with him. That was not going to happen, either, even though he told me, "You don't have to sleep with me, just lay on the bed and keep me company"... Yeah, given your track record, I'm SURE I can count on you to be a perfect gentleman! I really did feel bad that Samuel had driven so far (which is why I was hesitant to cut the date short), but I was not feeling this guy, and I wanted this date OVER, so I declined. I don't know if he got a hotel room or drove back to the city, but whichever he chose, he did alone!
Samuel messaged me a few days later, wanting to know when our next date would be. When I replied, "I don't think so", he wanted to know why. I reminded him of the conversation we had, the one where he asked if I was okay with him asking out my best friend... His reply? "I thought you were over that!" Wow. Good luck to you, Samuel.

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